I've been making a lot of stews lately; they are delicious. Have resolved to cook more in an attempt to be somewhat of a culinary goddess when Shawn and I move out in May. Also, moving out with Shawn in May, can't wait. He keeps me sane and smiling. Last night he did my dishes while I did homework and I love the domesticity of it all.

Casting for our major production, A Midsummer Night's Dream, probably on Monday. A little scared, but more excited than anything. Playing around with it has been wonderful, we are all so in love with the play and the characters and Shakespeare and our ideas and everything that could come of it. I can't wait to be cast and start delving into it for real.

Been thinking and talking to the girls about Vanessa a lot lately, worried and missing her like crazy. My world is a little less bright since she left. I wish she would talk to us, any of us. But in some ways it makes us closer, something to band together about and more reason to love one another.

Rewatching Freaks and Geeks with the roommates, which is wonderful and renews my faith in just about everything that is good. Whenever I am sad I look up Lady L on youtube and my life gets a little better.

( 2008: a year in review )

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

"Canadian Omar Khadr is a child soldier. He is the only child in modern times ever to be charged with murder for his participation in a battle. He is being detained pursuant to an extraterritorial detention regime originally established under a U.S. presidential decree, which the Supreme Court of the United States has found to be illegal on three occasions. Both presidential candidates in the November 4 election, Barack Obama and John McCain, have pledged to shut Guantánamo and to alter the process under which Omar is detained. Omar is scheduled to be tried within the current process on Nov. 28, after the presidential elections but before a new president takes office. U.S. officials have had discussions with the Canadian officials respecting his potential repatriation to face domestic criminal charges in Canada.

Omar was removed from Canada aged 11 by his family and taken to Afghanistan. At age 15 he was put into the service of a Libyan warlord in a military camp, and shortly thereafter he was present at a firefight between armed Afghan militants and U.S. military forces. During the encounter, Omar was struck with shrapnel from 500-pound bombs and mortar shells, shot and wounded, taken prisoner, and brought to the infamous Bagram Air Force Base. He was later removed to Guantanamo where he was held incommunicado and interrogated for more than two years, eventually charged with the murder of a U.S. soldier killed in the encounter. His family’s actions can be construed as child abuse, and any participation by Omar’s presence in battle can only be construed as the actions of a child soldier. He has been held in solitary confinement at Guantanamo Bay for years on end, and he has been tortured in custody by U.S. officials at both Bagram and Guantanamo. Australia, Denmark, France, Germany, Belgium, Russia, Spain, Sweden and the United Kingdom have all demanded and achieved the repatriation of their nationals from Guantanamo. Canada should bring Omar home."

Please help by signing this petition so that we can convince the Canadian government that immediate action is necessary.

http://www.petitiononline.com/omar567/

It is the first of October and absolutely beautiful outside. This makes it difficult to be anything but joyful.

School is good, sometimes. I swing back and forth between feeling excited and under control and falling into total despair over the sheer amount I have yet to do. I feel as if I am bonding further with some of my classmates, and I hope that I will create some great theatre. I freak out a little when I think that I won't be doing this a year from now.

I am making a conscious effort to lose weight and get in shape. My goals are to look good for Halloween and to be ready for physical theatre work in our collective creation show. Working out and eating healthy are a go!

Right now I'm really into gala apples, sauteed bell peppers and onions, and thai peanut sauce.

So far this month I have taken part in:

-The best day ever, where we had an epic picnic at the legislature grounds and played in the giant pool, then went for pitchers of bellinis and delicious food at Joey's.

-The best night ever, where we turned Vicki's entire living room into a fort made of pillows and blankets, had a slumber party, played truth or truth, and got very drunk.

-The best changeover ever, where we moved heavy set pieces through the mall between the theatre and the parking lot from midnight to 5 am, but somehow kind of had fun doing it.

and

-The best roller disco ever, where we went to a roller disco for Ainsley's birthday! I learned to roller skate, and also was dressed as Scary Spice.

Soon to come (hopefully): the best Fringe ever!

I won drag wars.
I am the hottest king around.
That is all.

In a few short hours, I will be competing in my first ever solo drag show. That's drag as in dressing and acting like a man, not as in racing cars. It's at the local gay bar (gay bar, gay bar!) and I am both terrified and extremely excited. My drag king name, I discovered after playing around with a few, is Johnny B. Bad. The prize is a hundred dollars! I can't fucking wait.

Back at the parents' house for a few days, house-sitting/making sure my sister doesn't burn the place down. It's weird, being in my old room. I feel very cut off from my regular life. It's not that bad though, I've mostly just holed myself up and spent some quality time reading, watching movies, and eating my parents' food.

I'll be glad to go home tomorrow, despite the squalor in which we live. Now that my girls have abandoned me for greener pastures and exciting jobs, I plan to do some h-core cleaning and attempt to keep it that way. I am very excited to move out at the end of the summer; though I love the people, I would not be entirely surprised if the ceilings began to cave in and the house imploded on itself with no warning. It's nice to spend a few days in a place that is not falling apart at the seams.

Life continues as usual, working, partying, squandering away my days. Still really enjoying not being in school. Work is good times as always. Having no free evenings makes me feel like I'm neglecting my other friends, but that's life sometimes. Going to Calgary on Sunday for closing of Frazier, can't wait to have Shawn back here. I plan on spending a lot of quality time spooning in the near future!

Lately I really enjoy salads with raspberry vinaigrette, fairy tales, and going to the farmer's market on Saturday mornings.

things that were in my purse yesterday:
-a small pie
-a bag of cucumbers
-my wallet
-my phone
-some salmon jerky
-all of my makeup
-leggings
-a bedsheet

things i have done since my last entry:
-finished my third year of university
-eaten some ice cream and some wings (not at the same time)
-drank various types of alcohol
-spent a while in calgary, in the company of my gentleman lover
-spooned
-watched a few movies
-enjoyed time with friends
-spent an afternoon on whyte ave with a moustache painted on my face
-played quite a bit of rock band
-celebrated my one year "jubsiversary" (jubilations anniversary!)

things i will probably do today:
-eat lunch
-go to work
-get drunk at cliffs

School is KICKING MY ASS in a major way. The plan to finish: have an energy drink during women's studies, buy a pack of cigarillos and maybe another energy drink on my way home. Stay up writing, allow myself a smoke every time I finish a women's studies reading log AND a section of the Chaucer paper. Stay up until it is all AT LEAST three quarters of the way done, however long this may take. Go to Chaucer on Friday, head to the computer lab, repeat writing pattern. Dress rehearsal for 383--plan shit out, make actors think I am prepared and not a total disaster as a woman and a director. Back to the lab, write at school until all work is finished. Be ready to party the weekend away!

As a slight bright spot, Shawn is taking me for lunch today; I am very excited to leave campus and to see somebody who is not in the drama department. He keeps me grounded and sane like I have not felt for a long time.

IN A WEEK THIS WILL ALL BE OVER.

on the downside, i have not slept much the last few days.
on the plus side, i am definitely smitten.
life is so, so good right now.

Have taken a snow day off of Chaucer, as it is -46 outside and I am not making the Arctic trek to school for just an hour of class, especially when I have to do it again for rehearsal tonight. It is days like this that I understand why Canada is so sparsely populated for such a large country--this is not a climate meant for human beings to live in!

We had our Christmas party at work last night, which wasn't as good as it should have been; I got very sad for no concrete reason, then annoyed with myself for being sad, etc. etc. The feeling lingers today. With any luck it will pass soon.

Time to curl up and read books that are not for school! What a rebel I am.

So I wanted to watch 10 Things I Hate About You at the junior high-style slumber party that Vanessa and I are throwing. I find myself wondering if this would be disrespectful in some way. Is there is a grace period after someone dies before which it is acceptable to think about and discuss with friends what a hottie he/she was?

I am obviously a terrible human being.

But I kind of like it?

In other news: our first annual drama department nudie calendar goes on sale tomorrow, three out of my four profs this term are total badasses, and my plans for tonight include baking cookies and singing karaoke! All in all, life is pretty rockin'.

The more my crazy roommate stripesalesman holds me down and forces me to watch Gravitation, the more I feel that she is Shuichi and I am Eiri, minus the true love part. Also, why do I even know this?! I fucking hate anime. Elena, you're the worst.

An average exchange:
ELENA: Oh my gawd I looove him he's soooo cute I'm going to dye my hair pink so I can be just like him!!!
ME: What the fuck. Why is his face doing that thing. What, why is he suddenly a cat?!
ELENA: Just watch this bit, it's soooo good. I love you Shuichi!!!!
ME: I hate you! I hate this! Anime is the worst! I want to die!
ELENA: Yaayyy! *filled with glee*

This is the atmosphere in which we all attempt to study for finals.

First, for stripesalesman:
GRILLZ & MACHO. NEVER FORGET!

In related news, here is my life lately:
-My kickass roommate Belyeana downloaded mothafuckin' Oregon Trail!
-New show at work; my new character uses choice phrases such as "willikers" and "holy horseshoes".
-Freaks and Geeks! I discovered it and watched all of it and am IN LOVE with everyone. Bill!
-Worked as a stage carp on Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead, which featured several lovely ladies of my acquaintance. The cast party was at our house and was epic; highlights included beer pong, pirate porn, and the hour of pantslessness.
-I was Harley Quinn for Halloween; it was pretty hot.
-I bullshitted my way through my take-home philosophy midterm, having done less than half of the readings and not really knowing what was going on. So far my prof has emailed me telling me that mine is one of the better written midterms he's read. I win!
-I underwent a hilarious, ridiculous teen movie-style sequence of sneaking out of my boyfriend's parents' house in the morning; freezing in the hall, tiptoeing through the room while their backs were turned, etc. It was a choice bit of physical comedy that was somehow successful.
-Life is pretty decent.

I have a strong and sudden longing to be in a foreign city, sipping dark sweet sangria on a patio in the muggy heat. My hair would frizz and curl and my nameless companion and I would speak of lost loves, faces distorted in the lamplight.

It's been too long since I've left this city.

It's been a weird few days emotionally. Nothing in particular, but everything in general.

We're attempting to transform our house from a student sty into something at least moderately presentable. So far it seems as if it's going to work. Our living room is already at least 80% more beautiful! Elena and I have been getting alarmingly domestic, arguing over tablecloth designs, etc.

My Shakespeare monologue has been reducing me to a bit of an emotional wreck when I work on it for too long. Which I think is a good thing? But tough, nonetheless. And bizarre.

I tried to make soda cracker candy, but the wax paper stuck to the bottoms and I felt like a failure. I am also wearing hot pink leggings that can only be pronounced a great success.

Everything right now is in the "not really, but sort of" range. No extremes, of either type. It's all right, but I could do with some excitement, I think. I'll be glad when this show is over and I can have my life back.

I love when you've been somewhat apathetically working on a show, and you're kind of sick of it, but then the night comes where there's an audience and suddenly everything is magical. It's that instant when I remember why I do this. And then afterward there is that excited energy and everybody is so happy and all is right with the world. That is me tonight.

Also, I seem to be sort of seeing someone, what. It's...good, so far. He makes me smile a lot and act like a massive girl but not really in a bad way.

Juliet's a bit of a whiny little bitch, as it happens, but I am rediscovering my love of Shakespeare nonetheless. The Germans were pretty sweet. My life is pretty sweet.

I have spent a lot of time backstage at the Roxy.
I'm starting to appreciate Romeo and Juliet.
My David Barnet impression is steadily improving.
Boy-related drama reached thus far unprecedented heights.
I realized why we only work in moments, and can never last.
I don't see my friends nearly as much as I should.
I spend more money on coffee than almost anything else.
School keeps me constantly excited and apprehensive.
I dressed up like a cowgirl. A cowgirl Indian?
I feel silly for missing work, but I miss work at Jubilations.
My eyes hurt from wearing contacts too much.
I've been getting my hopes up, maybe too high.
I forgot what someone's voice sounds like; I never thought I would.
I think I'm where I belong.
I feel strangely focused, considering how scattered I am.
Life is good.